My Journey

Qualifications

Licensed Professional Counselor (in Montana and Colorado)
Masters in Integral Counseling Psychology (California Institute of Integral Studies, 2018)
3-year training and supervision in working with expanded states of consciousness, psychedelic prep and integration, and psychedelic harm-reduction (2016-2019)
Restorative Justice circle-keeper training and apprenticeship (DC Peace Team and others, 2021-current)
Workshops in deconstructing white supremacy, ancestral reconnection for Euro-Americans, and embodied activism (White Awake, Stronghold)
Somatic Sex education (Levels 1 and 2, 2021)
Neotantra and conscious relationship workshops
Spiritual Emergence student group: reframing and supporting clients in spiritual crises and psychosis (2015)
Paranormal studies (ET abduction: positive and traumatic, elementals, interspecies communication)
Hakomi (somatic therapy, 2017)
Internal Family Systems (IFS) / Parts work
12 Steps to Wellbriety facilitator certification through White Bison (2023)
Crises intervention for domestic and sexual violence (2020)
Various Native American mental health conferences and allyship trainings
Energy work apprenticeship (2021- current): clearings, boundaries, and hygiene
Mindful Diversity training with Lee Mun Wah (2024)

Below is the story of my ongoing journey of healing from chronic illness, decolonizing my mind, body, and heart, and of spiritual awakening. I share this so you can get a feel for me and determine whether you want to work together. If you want to read about my professional journey, you can do so by visiting my therapy website here.

Long Illness and Recovery

My dog Sachi and I

In 2014 I fell ill. I was sick for the next eleven years, including periods of being debilitatingly sick: in bed, unable to work, with crippling anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts, unable to eat 90% of food, with very alarming fatigue and brain fog, and in a chronic state of despair and survival. I tried everything western and alternative medicine had to offer to little avail. I learned so much about self-care, regulating my nervous system, humility and surrender in the face of what my ego wanted to accomplish, getting comfortable with pain, energetic sensitivity, asserting my boundaries, and trusting my body as a barometer. Ultimately, the most powerful healer became rewiring my brain from limbic system impairment.

I became aware of how much our thoughts impact our reality. I started taking agency and command of my thoughts and redirecting them against every impulse towards despair and scarcity I felt in my body. Eventually I formed a critical mass of new neural pathways that helped me overcome the bulk of my chronic illness. I have a deep appreciation for how real and intense chronic illness is. It is one of the most profound teachers and initiations that exists. I am not a purist when it comes to healing approaches, and everyone has their own path, with many allies along the way.

I truly empathize with anyone going through this dark night of the soul, and bring a clarity based in personal experience to my interactions with people going through long illness.

Retreat

In 2020 I moved to what used to be my grandparents’ cabin in VERY rural Montana. For the next five years, I basically lived on retreat, in a lot of solitude. I cleared out a massive amount of space to focus on my inner world. I did little more than shadow work: excavating the belief systems that were keeping me separate from Source, developing intimate awareness of my consciousness, and developing an abiding inner presence that can only be described as self-love.

My days were saturated with deep communion with Spirit and the natural world…full of coherence, insight, and interspecies communication. This connection was the nourishing, wholesome, and restorative counterpoint as I also navigated my deepest pain, and did a deep dive into research about what might really be going on on our planet (think: creation stories, extraterrestrials, dark force interference, shadow government, the matrix, etc., which can get very dark). I don't pretend to have answers, but I keep an open mind to these possibilities, and I am also aware of how chronic illness, and the search for answers can resonate with these darker possibilities.

I had also been studying social and environmental justice and was very interested in the intersection of these decolonization movements with inter-dimensional power dynamics. During this time, I developed my subtle perception, and spiritual experiences started becoming an almost daily occurrence. That home and land has been my backbone, center pole, and grounding rod through transmuting my sacred wounds and dark night of the soul into an embodied and empowered spiritual awareness that I can share with others.

My Grandparents' Cabin

View from the back yard

Interspecies Communication

I am so privileged to have lived in such close proximity with our non-human relatives, and to have experienced so intimately my interconnectedness with the web of life. During that time, the animal kingdom and the land became my teacher. I started experiencing a transmission of consciousness directly from the land into my own consciousness.

That was a period of deep disentangling and deconditioning from untruths that had made me a profoundly confused person (including my socialization as a white, upper-middle class settler.)

While so many constructs were breaking down, the one throughline that kept reinforcing itself from the land was about decolonization. At that time, I hadn’t really heard of that word before. I ended up developing a deep understanding of decolonization directly from the land. I am so grateful to have experienced the quality of non-hierarchical, I-thou, and counselship relationships with non-human beings that reflects our innate relationship to them. I continue to tend to these important relationships.

The Message

When I had first landed at that house in 2020, I had a sit-down with the Spirit that lived there. There was a spirit there that I had sensed ever since I was little, although I had always sensed a disapproving quality from it. This time, I formally introduced myself, and after giving offerings, opened up a line of communication for it to tell me how it felt about my being there and the counseling work I intended to do there. It told me two things: That what I would do there would be in service of not just myself, but of others, and the natural world surrounding. It also told me not to underestimate the power of that place. I realized that the intimidatingly disapproving quality I had sensed before was merely protectiveness! It did not want me to take for granted the immense power that was there.

Overwhelmed by the gift of this clear communication, I readily and gratefully promised to honor the terms this spirit had laid out. After that, its presence transformed into a distinctly loving and supportive presence. This spirit ended up becoming one of my biggest allies, and I consult with it daily about decisions regarding the space, my healing practice, and myself as a clear lens.

I value reciprocity and giving back to the relations that give us life. In keeping with my promise to the guardian spirit of my grandparents’ cabin, five percent of my income goes toward indigenous, wildlife, justice, and decolonization causes.

My close friend and I in front of a waterfall

Coming Back to Community

Although this retreat was very special, there came a point when my healing required reconnecting with people. As is common for so many people who have struggled with long illness, a dark night of the soul, or spiritual crisis, I had isolated myself to try and regulate. But we are social creatures and we heal in connection. I had to apply myself and all the ways I had grown outwardly, to experience relational healing through direct, healthy relationships. As I did, I started to reexperience myself as a valuable, contributing, and interconnected member of community. I am currently in a phase of coming back to the village, so to speak. Re-igniting those interpersonal neural pathways that had been dormant has been like being reborn. I feel a quantum proliferation and abundance of the creative and healing power that is possible when we come together. I’m also experiencing a revival of the genuine love I have for humanity that was so present when I was young.

I have a deep respect for how long and mysterious our incubation periods can be before it’s our time to bloom. I have a deep trust in these hibernation periods, and the wisdom that can be gleaned. And I have an appreciation for how hard it is to navigate all of this in capitalism and our highly individualistic, fear-based society. I was definitely privileged to be able to stay in a family home deep in nature when I was very limited in my ability to work and support myself. I know not everyone has access to this privilege. But everyone has their own resources whether they be spiritual, emotional, or otherwise, and I am determined to help you harness yours. In the meantime, I use mine to show up more fully for you and this work.

More Lessons

Becoming Securely Attached

Over the years I have had the experience of getting hooked into some really dark energy and relationships by my own vulnerabilities, attachment wounds, and ego. These relationships almost completely derailed me from my purpose. In some cases, I got lost and distracted for long periods of time, and I am grateful to have made it out alive. I have had to heal my attachment wounds and come back to my wholeness to avoid these otherwise seductive pitfalls. I have a deep appreciation for how gnarly things can get (especially when someone is building real power,) whether that be getting involved with deeply unconscious people who we hemorrhage our life-force to, or getting entranced by evil forces that are pointedly targeting those who are waking up. Ultimately, we must heal our self-worth, codependency, boundaries, and our susceptibility to draining relationships.

Navigating Right Relationship

One of the biggest tenants of my approach to life is being in right relationship. I think about this fractally. If I want to see right relationship practiced at a macro level in the world, I have to practice right relationship at the micro level, in every personal relationship of my own, at every possible interaction, and at each moment with myself. It is an ongoing practice to be in integrity at most opportunities. Today I continue my training and practice of Transformative Justice. When I make big decisions, I always ask if I’m doing right by Spirit, by those I’m impacting, and by my higher self. I dream of real reparations, reconciliation, and land-back between Native and non-native peoples. I also dream about interspecies transformative justice circles and collaborative interspecies revolution.

Psychedelic Healing

One of my biggest allies has been psychedelic plant medicines. These are not a means to an end, but a catalyst to see what is possible beyond the veil of our default mode network. Once we glimpse what is on the other side with psychedelics, it is our responsibility to become a living bridge from this world of normative thinking to that reality of quantum and inter-dimensional possibilities. The practice of applying the insights we gain on psychedelics is very active, conscious, purposeful, and actually changes our DNA. I believe the point of psychedelics is for them to become obsolete to us. As we become the living reality of the truths we glimpse in those expanded states, we don’t need them anymore.

Addiction Recovery

One of my most profound teachers has been addiction recovery. For me, it has come in the form of recovery from heavy alcohol use, codependence, and sex and love addict behaviors. These strong attachments are what separates us from God… from experiencing ourselves as all-witnessing and all-loving awareness. I have a deep appreciation for how strong these forces of addiction can be. I also feel a deep sense of solidarity and respect for my brothers and sisters struggling with addiction and on the path of recovery. I think such confrontation with oneself and righting of relationship is the most profound, humbling, brave, clarifying, and badass thing someone can do. Addiction recovery is a path of the most intimate and genuine self-love. I pray everyone chooses the the beauty and power of such direct contact with oneself and others.

Flower Mandalas from Psychedelic Integration

How I Show up with You

I am also a recovering perfectionist, constantly healing my relationship with my inner critic! And although I am extremely driven, spiritual perfectionism is a trap. There is an artfulness, dynamism, soulfulness, and beauty in our human fallibility, imperfection, and self-destructive impulses. The goal is to not be too rigid, to embrace everything as a learning opportunity, and offer grace and allyship to ourselves and one another. I constantly encourage my clients away from pathologizing themselves, and towards being curious, and exploring the beautiful mystery that they are.

At the same time that I am serious and dedicated to spiritual awakening, I am also an artist and enthusiastic celebrant of life! I love dancing Argentinian tango, singing, storytelling, cooking, writing, and hospitality. I love beauty, curating aesthetics, and living a sensual life. I love the creative and vital forces of both darkness and eros.

I maintain ongoing relationships with my own guides, mentors, and support system to hold me accountable and help me see my blind spots. If you have been in my life, you have been one of my teachers. I am gloriously imperfect and always welcome feedback about my impact on others. I am a generous spirit and love sharing the beauty I see in the world with others.

My work informs every aspect of how I show up with you. You can read more about how I work here, or reach out to schedule a consultation.

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